1/29/2006

esoteric insults for the stressed out reader

(your friends will be shocked; your enemies will be puzzled)

  • Quit crackin mirrors, you nose-necked fishgurgler!

  • Your ass-crevice is canyonesque.

  • You put the dope in dopamine. The pinhead in ePINephrine. The tone-deaf in seroTONEin.

  • Hey, I need nincompoops for blender-play - and you look just the type.

  • Drop the attitude or no one will fertilize your ovaries.

  • Wipe that clown grin, putznerd.

  • Yo featherhead - methinks you got roosters driving your cockpit.

  • Is Elvis alive? Hell no! He thought of you - and killed himself again.

  • You bloody box of earwax; you make me puke out snotrags of shit.

  • If you were a musician, you'd have a 'worst of' album. And it would be called 'Greatest Hitlers'.


(FIAC: on the cutting edge of phrase-coinage since 2004)

6 comments:

Aim said...

heheheheheee

Mrs DC said...

I like the hitlers line.

Kaufman said...

Man, it's uncanny that I'd bump into DDC here since I haven't visited for quite some time and because I don't like the Hitlers line. I'd sooner laugh at:

If you were a musician, you'd have a 'worst of' album. And it would be called 'Greatest Shits.'

I know toilet humour has been done to death but so have Hitler gags.

Bobby said...

Nothin like crackin on somebody's ovaries. Gives me ghost pain in my ghost ovaries.

Penny said...

genius.

ROFL!

The tone-deaf in seroTONEin.

Is Elvis alive? Hell no! He thought of you - and killed himself again.

awesome.. I'm gonna use these..credit to you.

Anonymous said...

You're the reason they have to put instructions on Shampoo.