top four alternative uses for onion rings

1. crispy, oil-absorbent engine gaskets
2. oversized eyeglass rims
3. llama snares (you slip the onion ring over the hoof of a llama, and voila, he's all yours. but be sure to tie a string to it, or he'll get away!)
4. if you chop them up with a kitchen knife, then voila, you got yourself some finely chopped onion rings. don't eat these though--use them for french fried onion ring soup.

any other suggestions?

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